Letter to Myself

Written March 22, 2018

Dear Me,

Haven’t seen you since I was a kid. I miss you. I remember how we used to play. Everything we saw was an opportunity rather than an obstacle. But life is rough. Somehow we got disconnected. I lived my life thinking that the events of my life affected me, alone. But in reality, they were supposed to bring me closer to you. I alienated myself from you when I was scared. When I didn’t know what to do, I followed the world rather than following you. And for that I’m sorry. I miss when we were in harmony. I got caught in the mindset that if I find a way to cope with something, it would go away. I missed so many appointments with my internal therapist, thinking I can solve my problems myself. And even worse, I went to the outside world for the solution. But I learned my lesson. Though I got this far, I know it was you unconsciously driving me while I thought I was in full control. So I’m ready to follow your lead. I’m ready to go where we’re supposed to go. No more second-guessing you. Even when you’re wrong, you’re right. There must be something for me to see if it doesn’t seem ideal for me. The bottom line is that I’m putting my trust in you again.

Love,
Isa

Isa Abdul-Quddus is a former NFL Athlete, playing 6 years at safety for the Saints, Lions and Dolphins. After suffering a career ending injury, he took his focus to sharing his story, emphasizing on mental health. Isa also loves music (Hip Hop and R&B), film and reading.